98
Feeling MUCH much better today! It's weigh day and I was somewhat nervous about the scale, this week has felt so shaky. 194!! WOW!!! PHEW!!! It's ridiculous that a number can make that much difference, but it really does. I really didn't want to spend a whole month or more taking off Aruba weight---I would have done it regardless, but oh, it's a relief that I don't have to. When I left on vacation I was 193--which is the weight I need to be for the insurance to cover ww costs (once again kudos to the insurance!). Tiffany, from PEHP, knew about the vacation and was so sweet, telling me that if I needed more time to reach goal they would work with me, but still I wanted to be where I was supposed to be if not ahead. And now, I think I WILL stay a little ahead of the goal. I feel very motivated and excited today--I want to see 192. That is a weight I haven't seen since before Catherine was born and I'm SOOOO close! Every pound after that will break new ground and I can't wait.
Other happy things--I finally bought myself a new pair of walking shoes--about time--I meant to buy them and have them broken in before the half-marathon, but better late than never I suppose. Also, I'm looking into publishing on e-readers. I wrote a very silly "diet" book a long time ago. E-books are the perfect format for that.
Food-wise, I'm on track today. I'm keeping the breakfast and lunch points very low so can I enjoy pizza and homemade ice-cream tonight. Dave made me some zero point soup--so I'm having that and a salad and some wasa crisps with laughing cow cheese for lunch--with the result that my lunch really weighs a lot (I know this because I carried it as I walked to work). For breakfast I had a banana and some greek yogurt. All that adds up to 9 points. I can work with that! And now, I'm going to go and happily log that into the ww site.
Hopefully, I still can. I cancelled my meeting membership and, if they got it right, switched to a just online plan. I felt badly about wasting the money on meetings that I never go to and that just make me mad when I do go. As I've said before, the ww online site is outstanding.
Today I just feel hopeful and happy and relieved and it that feels really good.
Losing weight in spite of myself.
I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
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