I actually did pretty well last night---I DID go and plot the points--ooops. My lunch splurge didn't leave me much for dinner, and although I went a little bit over, I did NOT just throw in the towel and have it all. It really was just a little bit over. I call that success.
However, today I weighed myself--why, I don't know, tomorrow's my official day and I felt as heavy as a rock. 186. Sigh. I've just been putzing around at this weight forever. I'm considering doing something drastic. There is always the 6 day diet--how many ways can a person eat chicken? I was thinking of this--then I thought--well, if I want to go extreme for a little while and just pull off a few pounds of water weight or whatever, I could always, GASP---follow the weight watchers plan!! I mean REALLY follow it--not add on the 7 extra points every day in addition to whatever days I'm completely off the wagon--but have a week of exercise and 29 points a day period. That's extreme enough--I would anticipate being hungry for a week, but I'd also break through and see some exciting numbers on the scale. And it seems that if I see those numbers once, it signals my body that those are possible numbers to live at and my body seems more willing to drop down and stay down. Do I want to start that this Saturday? I'm going to SLC in the morning and it might involve a lunch out with Dad and Lisa--of course staying faithful to any plan IS going to involve mine fields like a lunch out--but I have no intention of living on 29 points a day forever (and ww would prefer it be 27!)--At a bare minimum I want those 7 extra points--which I'll probably use eating pizza to celebrate the end of the week.
Wow--today's blog exemplifies fat thinking--going to extremes, rewarding myself with food, embracing temporary "quick fix" measures, and rationalization. I think though that I might really go for the rationale that I need a "jump start" and behave myself for a week and see what happens.
Losing weight in spite of myself.
I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
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