Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Friday, June 3, 2011

Doesn't Count

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Up a pound---197, but I'm saying it doesn't quite count because Dave had to teach late and so we didn't eat dinner until after 8:00.  This included a big glass of sugar-free Hawaiian punch (love that stuff) that I don't think has worked its way through my system yet.  SOOO---I'll weigh again tomorrow and whichever is lower is what I'll plug into the official ww site. Even still---it's really nice to see numbers in the 100's again.   I'm thinking this upcoming week, I'll try simply dividing up the extra points into my daily ration---that will bring me up to 36 points a day.  I've been trying to save up lots of extra for the weekends because I like pizza on Friday---but really, Saturday's aren't usually that much worse temptation-wise than any other day----really it's just the Friday pizza I want.  But it's possible to have very low-point meals once in a while (wouldn't want to do it all the time---there is only so much zero point soup a person can eat), so I think I can still manage to have two or three slices on Friday.  I would still have activity points for wiggle-room if necessary.  We'll see how it goes.  Will I feel more in control and satisfied? Or will I just want more and more and more anyway so everything will begin inching up and up and out of control? 

Today's challenges are all psychological.  Am trying to call Mom.  And Dr. Fowler gave me all kinds of suggestions for the Aruba presentation--I think I feel better--but still enough overwhelmed and insecure that I just want to avoid the whole thing.  Never again!  If I want to go somewhere amazing again I'll just pick up a part time job at McDonald's and earn the money to do it.

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