This is nice. I'm hungry, but weirdly don't mind. Somehow I'm feeling more relaxed, and more like what I'm doing is eating normally and not this huge burdensome effort. I think a couple things are contributing to this.
First, ice-cream. I've had some goodies this week--starting with the crazy huge brownie last Sunday. Last night was fun. We went to the temple and for the first time went to Farr's ice-cream right next to the temple. It has a fun Disney-like happy atmosphere, and was filled with the people we just went to the temple with. I had a small caramel caribou sundae which was simply great.
Second--free food. Today is a 1600 day. I'm a little hungry just now sitting at the desk, but I've discovered that it's not being hungry that bothers me so much, it's being hungry and then just having a small amount of food to look forward to that I don't believe will fill me up that bothers me. Today I have a lean pocket pizza and a cabbage salad. I know from experience that this is not terribly filling. But today that's ok. If I like, I have both zero point soup and also a big hunk of butternut squash. That will certainly get me to dinnertime with reasonable happiness.
The other thing that's really helping is my own pre-made calorie counts. I don't have many made yet, but I've already used the file several times. Today to look at the cabbage salad, the other day to look at leftover spaghetti for lunch. I'm LOVING this. This is my own food. I eat this stuff all the time, in these certain specific combinations---spaghetti, peas, garlic bread for example. I'm loving not having to look up every little thing all the time. When I was preparing lunch today I made up a card for this lunch--it's a simple lunch--pizza pocket and salad, but it will be great to just take a quick a look and know see what it's worth.
Dave works late tonight. I plan to take advantage of the time and exercise and practice harp.
Losing weight in spite of myself.
I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
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