Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Thursday, March 22, 2012

349 old habits

I'm feeling better today--I slept really well and that always helps. At Mom's I was reminded just how fast old bad habits can re-surface--maybe especially since I was in my childhood home where those habits were originally grown.  I had a salad and a hotpocket and a sm. bag of chips for dinner. Fine. THEN I had two string cheeses, 3 slices of salami and a handful of wheat thins. Basically a second meal--Not Fine.

The weather is simply beautiful today--I am leaving an hour early so I could walk to work and back and still get to SLC at a reasonable time. I might not be blogging for a few days unless I can get onto Lisa's laptop.  I'm going to spend the night tonight and tomorrow. Pick up Catherine on Saturday night and take her back to Ogden and then I'll see. I have Monday off for the Disney auditions--and to take Catherine back to Provo. It'll be one day at a time for the next little while.  But I did make my healthy cheese tortellini last night before I went to bed and I have it for lunch today, so that's a good thing.

I also wanted to mention my mile the other day. A couple posts ago I ran two miles which about did me in. Well, the next day I decided to run just one mile and then do some bike. I did some of the mile at 4.8 and some at 5 mph. Still pitiful, but at least I finished with a sub-13 minute mile. It helps my self-respect a little bit.  It really wasn't that much harder (or faster), but I can't read at that pace. I just don't know how real athletes do it--it wasn't so much that I was tired, as that I was BORED. I couldn't wait to be finished. I'm going to have to figure out how to download books to my i-pod. Music has never satisfied me--it's MUCH better to work out with music than without, but a book is better still.

1 comment:

  1. I completely agree. Even a bad book is better than working out to nothing.

    ReplyDelete