Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Thursday, October 30, 2014

TIRED!

Wow, I'm tired out today. But a couple of good things happening. My knee continues to improve. A set back like this really makes me think that I might be on the right track. I've noticed that the beginnings of many successful journeys have big setbacks right at the beginning. Yesterday--

Breakfast: Oatmeal with fruit, splenda, cinnamon, milk.

Halloween pot-luck.  Oh my.  meatballs, smokies, 7-layer dip, chips, cheeseball, crackers, 2 kinds of salad, jalapenos, lots of desserts. yum.

Dinner----I didn't want any. All I really wanted was a bowl of popcorn. BUT I made real food for Dave, and the thought occurred to me that I should have at least a small amount of real food too---for nutrition, and maybe to not be so hungry today. I did. A little sweet and sour chicken, rice and veggies--skipped the eggroll (unusual for me), and had my popcorn. I ate more of the popcorn than necessary, but at least Dave at half and I did not eat cheese and chocolate milk with it, so that was a bonus.

I liked the thinking about dinner. It sounded sooooo, Normal. Like something a good mom would say.  Eat the good stuff first. Why? Because you need it. Maybe it worked too.  I wasn't overly hungry this morning.  I worked hard in kettlebell class, and there was candy. i wasn't even slightly interested in the candy. All I wanted was the apple in my office.

For lunch I had pizza (1 slice) and salad and 100 cal popcorn, and a string cheese. But I wasn't very happy with that lunch. I didn't want pizza. I don't know what I really wanted, but it wasn't junk food. Good sign!

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