Well, I didn't cave and make funeral potatoes, but I'm definitely having a reaction today. Last night turned out pretty well. I did make the very healthy Japanese Hot Pot--I had two bowls of that plus an egg roll and PLUS about 6 of a new cookie reciepe that is truly a healthy recipe!!! No fat, no sugar and no flour!!!! It's bananas, oatmeal and a little applesauce, I added nuts and dark chocolate chips. NOT BAD!!!! Nothing can ever really replace the true chocolate chip, but these are a strong contender! You could literally eat them for breakfast just fine!!!
Still, today I'm in trouble. There wasn't anything in the house I wanted to eat for lunch, Dave is in SLC today so there's no one to share a pizza with, and I had a wild craving for McDonald's. I almost NEVER go to McDonalds, but on the spur of the moment I ran down and got my favorite bacon, egg and cheese biscuit meal. I think the reasoning, if you can call it that, was that I wanted a big hunk of cheese and I do still have white flour rolls at home---that's not a very good choice. So, since I'm not willing to make a poor #2 choice, I went with the distant #10 REALLY bad choice. Worse, I didn't pack a lunch, so I'll be eating out. There's a slim chance that I might go to subways for a healthy lunch, but it's much easier to just go upstairs to the buffet or to the new grill.
On the bright side, at least I'm finally full.
LATER---
Ok, I need to write what's going on today. That McDonald's breakfast, that looked so little to me, actually filled me up really well. So well, that I wasn't hungry at all at lunch. Especially after I had a string cheese. What I SHOULD have done was to just wait or skip it or have an early dinner. I didn't. I went to the new corner bakery and had a full lunch (Very tasty!). I think what's partially going on is that it's Friday and the best pizza would be a PIE calzone, but I also wanted to try the bakery.
Why could I not have waited till 4:30 then gone to the PIE after work and taken Catherine to the bakery tomorrow? (Because she wants to go to Sonora Grill). Maybe I was afraid I'd be hungry? I really do hate being hungry and I felt hungry a lot yesterday. But at worst, I would have only been hungry for 3 hours.
So what will I do tonight? I WANT to go to the pie, but I'm not hungry now (partially because I ate a bunch of cookie bites from the bakery, AND several healthy cookies that I brought. What on earth is wrong with me today? I think I want the PIE out of habit.
When it comes to food it's so hard for me to delay gratification. The pie isn't going anywhere and neither is the bakery.
Losing weight in spite of myself.
I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
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