Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.

The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

452 the wedding

Hey! It's working at work today!! YAY!! That does make my life much easier. Anyway, to do a little catching up--I went to the long anticipated wedding that promised unlimited amounts of bread, cheese and olives. No cheese--but plenty of olives AND tortellini and ceasar salad--all weaknessnes. I had two platefuls. Nobody else had two plates---granted nobody was watching and I really don't think anybody cared, but I was embarrassed. I vowed that this was it. Never again would I take two platefuls when everyone else only took one. I meant it too---still do. Talk about a red flag that I'm eating too much! But the very next day we had some friends up for dinner. We ate fajitas outside--and I went back for a small plate of seconds---this was a little different--I thought that others would take more too, but they DIDN'T. Okay---rule needs changing--the obvious change is to simply take ONE plate in public period. But at the very least I'm going to wait and see if the general consensus is to have more than one--if so (like at work when everyone just planned to have 2 slices of pizza) then maybe it's ok in a blue moon. But on the whole. ONE just ONE plate--and it doesn't need to be heaping full either! Today I'm sort of casually on track. Good breakfast and lunch--not counted, but good. Dinner will be our Somalian dinner, but I think it will be pretty diet friendly as well. A kind of beef stew, a little flat bread and a coconut sort of pudding thing for dessert.

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