Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Tuesday, March 29, 2011

keeping the fruit

Weird day, it's 1:00 and I'm STILL not hungry for lunch. It's very abnormal for me to just skip it, but I think maybe I might.  Actually it's 2:00 now--I've had some snap peas and am munching on girl scout cookies because they sound good. My delicious ravioli doesn't sound good at all.  I wonder if I AM becoming sick?

Anyway, I wanted to mention that if I do ww, I will keep elements of Lean and Free--a fruit and veggie for lunch and dinner, a fruit (and veggie if I can) for b-fast, and lots and lots of water.  That will fit in fine in WW and--with the possible exception of today, I've never felt so well.  WW will involve similar obnoxious planning to the LF diet, but at least there is a huge support group plus a nifty little calculator.  I'm determined not to go hungry no matter what, but I'm also going to try hard to listen to my body and if I want LESS then to go with that as well.  I'm kind of hoping that trying this again might clear my mind--if it's yelling that I WANT three fajitas when I've had enough with one or two---that I can A: recognize I've had enough. B: Put some in the freezer so I can feel secure that it will be there later. C: have enough hope that stopping will actually result in the weight loss that I want so badly.  D: Maybe even develop foresight to have the fajitas on a free-bie day because I know they're one of my favorites. OR--advanced technique here---someday realize that I can forgo having as many as I want (assuming I 've had as many as I need) and still be happy, in the same way that I can forgo buying everything at the mall that I want and still be happy.   This is a VERY advanced technique that I'm nowhere near ready to adopt--but I'm trying.

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