Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Okay but boredom looms

Yesterday did indeed go well. 1750 calories really is enough to keep me reasonably full, and having the food I like makes a big difference. However, that is not the addiction. The addiction is that I want what will make my MIND satisfied. Meaning one cookie was perfectly satisfactory physically, but NOT emotionally. This is an emotional problem. Often the emotion doesn't run any deeper than that I like cookies and enjoy eating them, so pass the plate please!

My history has been that I can do about anything for a short amount of time. But over the long haul? Not so much. This is true of everyone of course. What I'm hoping is to hang onto this until November despite the fog of boredom that is even now looming on the horizon. I HOPE that by then I'll have established a new "normal" of how much I need to be eating on a daily basis. The temptation obviously will be to just go crazy and put it all back--especially with the holidays. To combat this I will join my in the no gain games that are always going on at work. Not gaining over the holidays will be the goal. I'm going to have to be strict about weigh-ins and catch small gains early. I HOPE that the idea that I just need to maintain rather than lose will feel free enough that I can tolerate it emotionally.  Between now and then I'd better think up some strategies for what I'm going to do in case it isn't enough.


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