Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Thursday, April 24, 2014

Poor Sister

Next challenge to figure out. How do I circumvent the, "I can't have it tomorrow, so I'd better eat it today?" feeling. Technically speaking, I shouldn't have it today either! It's vegetarian day, not eat all the cookies and chocolate I can get day. It's so easy to lose track.

Unfortunately, I have an example of what happens when a person loses track completely. My poor sister--she's turning 40 this year. Catherine is graduating tomorrow with her associates degree and everyone is invited up. I live about 1 hour away from my Dad and sisters. Dad is coming up, my sister would have liked to, but decided she'd better not try it, because there is no parking immediately by the building and she can't make the short walk to and thru the building. I'm sure she's also worried about fitting onto the seats. She also can't really drive anymore because she can't stay alert enough to be safe, also she's lost her license, but even if she had one, she's hampered by fears and I doubt she'd be able to make a drive that's a whole hour away. It's just sad.

Comparatively, I'm doing great. But it's a bad comparison. How badly am I hampered by my poor choices? How awake would my mind be? How much more could I do if I ever conquer this problem?

No comments:

Post a Comment