Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.

The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Slow healing

Still way busy and still tired from the big trip. I must have really worn myself completely out. I'm please that I haven't gone crazy and tried to super restrict my eating out of fear of vacation weight. I've had at least two incidences where I've surprised myself by being able to treat food normally, whereas before I wouldn't/couldn't have made these decisions. The first was last Saturday. I went to a volunteer training for the Make a Wish foundation--neatest place I ever saw! Lone Star Steak House donated food for our lunch, including rolls with cinnamon butter. It was the butter that got me. I went through the line and ate my lunch. I would have loved another roll, there was time for another roll and nobody would have cared but somehow I stopped. This wasn't will power, it was just a calmish recognition that I really had had enough and I didn't need it and it wasn't a special enough treat to get one. Same sort of thing yesterday. We went to the Verizon store to finally get new phones then went to the mall for dinner and to get covers for them. I wasn't very hungry, but they have a wonderful Greek place at the food court. I got my usual platter, but although I could have easily eaten it all, I kind of didn't want to. I knew I wasn't particuarly hungry. I went and got a take home container. Again, it wasn't diet or discipline here. It was more the same sort of feeling that I had at the Eddie Bauer store 5 minutes later. Cute winter coats for $179. Yes, they were cute. Yes, I would have liked one. Yes, the price wouldn't bankrupt us, but they WERE more expensive than I needed or wanted and I had no problem not buying one.

More on the benefits of having a real phone tomorrow.

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