Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Monday, October 15, 2012

Munchie

Yikes!! Annoying after my fine feelings yesterday to be so munchie today. Everything seems to be going down the hatch. I think I know why, but I don't know how to put a stop to it. I'm a little tired--irritating to sleep so well all weekend, and then be restless on a work night. I have a lot of little things to do to get ready for our trip---not an overwhelming amount, but still a lot and I'm in a state of excitement and also some minor nerves--have I thought of eveything? Can my family really hold off and not implode before I leave? Will American airlines (who have been having problems in the news lately) get us there on time? Minor-level stuff---besides, I can't do a thing about my family or the airlines so why worry? I also think stepping on the stupid scale is having an effect. Deep down I might be worried that I'm going to revolt and go on a diet--especially after this trip. Also--part of me equates "nourishing my body" with difficulties and I'm happy to avoid those. I wish I could just shout at my brain--"whatever!!" and have done with it. I've already got lots done and I have plenty of time after work to take the key to the cat sitter, go to the ATM, mow the lawn, go to the store and finish up packing. Unlike poor Dave, I also have tomorrow after work to pack last minute things.

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