Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Forgot the banana!

OopS!!!  I did great yesterday on flavor point. Once more, I got confirmation that when I eat "real" old-fashinoned type food, I fill up. For dinner I made orange tilapia, bulger wheat, beans and a salad. The tilapia fillets were small, so I made two for each of us. I was done 1/2 through the meal--partially from nutrition, and partially because those foods don't stimulate cravings, so I was done.

I need to eat more food that doesn't stimulate cravings. The problem is that I don't CRAVE those foods! I can't imagine wanting tilapia more than another food. Mom used to make all kinds of stuff I didn't particuarly like---liver and onions, tuna casserole, cheese souffle etc. In fact, probably MOST nights was food I wasn't over the top thrilled about. It was just dinner time.  That's really changed since I became the cook. I cook GOOD food. Even when it's healthy, it's food that I get excited about. I don't know that I'm quite ready to change this. For now, it's good to know and to watch out for.

1600 cal today. I'm starving, but mostly because I forgot to bring the banana to eat with my lunch. I'll head home and make a dinner and eat 80 calories more than I would otherwise. it's nice to know that I don't HAVE to feel this way. I could have gone upstairs and bought a banana. I could have eaten part of the granola bar in my cupboard. On the way home today I think I'll devote the time to thrashing out what I will do when I feel genuinely hungry but have already eaten  my share for the time. Do I try to tough it out? (not a great track record), Do I have something healthy? (spins out of control pretty fast).  What would be a good "non-craveable" food?  Maybe weight watchers famous 0 point soup. Except that I might not need it very often. Could I freeze some? It would have come in handy today.

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