Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Saturday, January 25, 2014

Too much

Boy, you just can't trust skinny people to provide for office treats. The cheese dip was wonderful, but ONE bag of chips for the 14 of us? No doubt there's some sort of correlation between my tiny coworker and what she thinks is a large amount and myself and what I think is a large amount. But I firmly refuse to acknowledge any such thing in the face of really good chips and dip.

Spectacular fail yesterday in "letting go."  I made sure I didn't suggest to Dave to not buy the breadsticks and he came through with flying colors and ordered the cheesy bread first thing. I thoroughly enjoyed way too much calzone and breadsticks while watching Hitchcock's The Birds.  However, although I ate too much, I was at least hungry. And I don't think it's entirely a bad thing to feel hungry and want something and then experience the joy of really having that something. I gave myself a red star for being technically on track--I was vegetarian at least.

This week is mostly calorie counting at various levels with a Flavor Point day and a low carb day thrown in. That'll be fine.  Today I'm just happy because two t-shirts which have been a little snug across the chest are fitting better! YAY!!!  I got up and did the 40 min total body burn dvd, and I'll eat 1900 cal and be just fine in every way.

No comments:

Post a Comment