I really need to accept the idea that it's ok to eat less, even if I'm "entitled" to eat more. Yesterday was fine calorie-wise, I was very good about lunch. I planned on a slice of Catherine's homemade bread and guessed it was 100 cal. But when the bottom of the slice turned out thicker than I planned, I decided that it was a pretty hefty piece and called it 150. Melted an ounce of cheese on top and had it with Dave's low fat stew. It was really filling. I think I could have stopped 1/2 way through the bread. Also, I wasn't exactly starving for the 100 cal popcorn later. I'll have to do more thinking about that. If I'm not losing weight, then I need to make an adjustment. And all scale woes aside, I don't have that skinny "I'm losing weight" feeling. It's hard though--Usually I only get that feeling when I'm doing something like weight watchers and also feeling starved. I don't want to do that, it only leads to failure. OK---any adjustments here need to be VERY gentle so I don't derail my own efforts.
Such as! Last night, I had about 900 cal left for dinner. That's enough that I often don't bother counting, figuring that pretty much anything is within that range. Umm, No. I decided to be sure and actually count out the fajitas and I'm glad I did. It's still a guesstimate because I'm never quite sure on stuff like stew meat mixed with veggies, but I figured one of my fajitas, with a side of black beans and home baked chips was 670 calories! That's a perfectly acceptable amount for a dinner, but I wouldn't want to eat twice that and I easily could have and usually do. Kudos to me for counting. That's a gentle change I can do.
Today is 2000 cal again but without salt. There's something else. I bet if I cut down on my salt I'd lose a bunch of weight. I wonder if I want so much salt because I have low blood pressure? However that may be, I need to work on not going crazy with salt.
Losing weight in spite of myself.
I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
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