Why oh why oh why do workouts take so long?? I did the 40 min Hip Hop workout today and I swear it lasted at least two hours even though the clock says it only took 40 minutes. It was a tough workout for me. I was dripping sweat. Good! I'll try and get back to that work out fairly often until it isn't a tough workout any longer. For now though, I'm just glad to be sitting here typing.
Yesterday was "high protein" and so for dinner we had steak, we also had shrimp even though that was supposed to be for the upcoming "pineapple day." We'll have more shrimp tomorrow. I also tried a new broccoli garlic oven bake that was delicious. That's a do again for sure. The only problem with the dinner was the size of it. I took my piece of steak, and a potato, and the brocolli and the low-cal coconut shrimp and realized that I had a LOT of food on my plate. The thought did cross my mind that I didn't have to eat it all, that I'd probably be happier with just half. I should have gotten up and put back half, but I didn't. I foolishly thought I'd quit when I was full. Why I would think that I have no idea. I ate all but the last bite of steak, plus a few more shrimp. Technically, I was still within bounds--it wasn't a calorie counting day after all, but that dinner was huge and knew it and still ate it anyway. I gave myself a silver star and will try to do better next time.
However, I'm excited about my progress! I don't think I've lost any weight yet, but the fact that I would think I would only want and need 1/2 my meal is a big step for me! And it wasn't that I'm trying to lose weight. The feeling came from some real security that I could have more if I wanted more, that plenty more days and meals would come my way so I didn't need to worry (this is all good intuitive eating feelings). It really felt as though my inner skinny me was allowed to surface and voice what she wanted. It makes me want to protect her and encourage her voice.
Losing weight in spite of myself.
I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
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