Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Monday, March 31, 2014

MONDAY!!

Today is MONDAY.  Nothing terrible, everything irritating---the most irritating is trying to get the right people to sign these forms so i can apply for a grant. This is made all the more irritating because I've put this off until the last second and now people aren't available etc. etc. and it's my own fault so I have no one to blame.  On the bright side, Dave brought me flowers!!!  Suddenly, the day is looking better!

Food-wise, I'm doing well.  It was hard to stop at just one piece of pie last night, but I did. Today is flavor point, which is always hard, but I had that slice of bread to go with lunch and that made all the difference.  There are m & m cookies in the kitchen, but I'm still feeling encouraged with the idea that my choices actually make a difference. Also, one of the most beautiful girls I work with won't have one either, she's got some digestive problems and can't tolerate that kind of stuff very well---I suspect her choices are part health driven and part good sense driven, but it helps a great deal to see someone without a weight problem say no to the cookies too.

I was only able to get in 1/2 hour of wellness time--but that's ok! That means anything I do tonight will count toward earned calories. I'll put in at least another 1/2 hour.

Best of all one grant application will go completely in--and the other will be sent to my mentor. Mostly, all I have to do now is sit and wait for approvals--or not. At this point I don't care. I'm just glad to have them done!!

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