Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Monday, March 10, 2014

Snack?

Still feeling great and full of self-acceptance. It's a wonderful feeling. Doesn't mean I don't struggle though.  I think? I made an ok decision.  I was pretty hungry by 10:00 when I went walking for my wellness time. I went to the bank and the grocery store is nearby, so I got the olives that I like--that was planned---the loaf of good bread was not planned and neither were the free pats of butter.  But on the way back to work I was even hungrier and I walked by the Starbucks which I knew sold pretzel melts.  Seized by addiction I went in, but I asked if they happened to know what the calorie count was.  They did! 490. Ouch. Too much for a snack. I left and went back to my office where I had a slice of the good bread with a little butter and a few olives. That was probably about in the right neighborhood for a snack. MUCH better than a pretzel melt.

I seem to be on a anti-jogging or even walking fast crusade. I don't know why. My knees? Do I have some weird breathing problem? Luckily, I don't seem to be objecting to video workouts. OK--I'll have to carve out time for video workouts then. Somehow I've got to do something about all this sitting. It can't be good to be either full on working out or doing nothing. I need a middle ground that isn't being a slug.

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