I LOVE Hollie at 300poundsdown. She writes the most beautifully inspiring posts. Which I usually enjoy wholeheartedly--but today I felt a little inferior. Usually my posts are not inspiring and I wish that they were. No wonder nobody reads this blog. Oh well. I think the real problem is that I know I have some real work to do with my sister and I don't want to do it. And when I say I don't want to do it, I mean, there is literally nothing on earth that I wouldn't rather do--including active duty combat. I suppose we all feel that way about our particular obsticles in life, if we could face them or solve them easily then they wouldn't be obsticles. The point is that the dread of this is pulling me down a little. So rather than feel badly about my blog inferiority, I will simply say BRAVO to Hollie and Sean and all the other great people out there who cheer up my days. God Bless them!
I was pleased today to not have used this blog to escape! I'm trying to get the college to pay for a trip to NYC this summer and it means a whole lot of red tape and even worse, academic writing. I had some time before having to come out to the desk and I was tempted to get online and write my daily post. But I didn't!! I sat down and worked on the stupid proposal.
Food-wise. I still deliberately out of control. But cheerful about the exercise idea--one of my co-workers has a friend who "earns" extra food with exercise--she saves up for two weeks and then has a day where she eats 5,000 cal. Works for her!! I doubt I'd want to save up that much. I'm more likely to want to cash in small amounts frequently, but I think I won't worry about it. If I want to have a huge blowout--great! I CAN!!! Say I want the pizza pie buffet. If I figure that's 3000 cal--that's just fine! 500 of those cal are about what I would eat anyway--and I can collect the other 2,500 in a reasonable amount of time. Last night's mall greek food is even easier---figure that meal was about 1,200 cal. 500 I would eat anyway--I only have to "earn" 700 cal! 2 1/2 hours of walking. I can do this!!
Losing weight in spite of myself.
I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.
The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.
There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.
Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!
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