Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Tuesday, July 12, 2011

102 Oh for heaven's sake

Honestly!!  I HATE weight watchers.  As I've said multiple times in this blog, the meetings drive me crazy to the point of actually being counter-productive, so I never go.  I AM faithfully following their on-line tools though---that website IS useful to me.  WW talks about people who have success with their "online program" giving the impression that there is actually an online program.  Anyway--I didn't check carefully enough.  I foolishly thought you could just do the online program for a lesser amount that the meeting program.  I thought it wasn't right for the insurance to be paying for meetings that I never go to and that I should just switch to the online program.  I emailed weight watchers accordingly as follows:

Hi, please switch me from the monthly pass option to the online option only. I find the meetings very frustrating. Please don't cancel me altogether! I very much need and want the e-tools. Thank you.
Anneli Byrd
Apparently that wasn't quite clear enough for the customer service guy who sent me a response saying that he could cancel me and that I might want to consider weight watchers online.  I responded:

YES!!!  As I said in my email, I want to remain on weight waters online.  So, YES, I want to cancel my monthly pass and sign up for WW online.  
Thanks for responding so quickly.
Sincerely,
Anneli
Okay---so today someone else canceled me as I asked.  But now I do NOT have access to e-tools!  I had foolishly assumed that weight watchers online would include e-tools--which to my mind is the thing that makes the online program USEFUL--but I guess not.  I failed to read the fine print which tells me that e-tools is ONLY for those with the monthly membership.  What's probably going to happen now is that I'll have to re-sign up (hopefully without an additional sign-up fee) but I'm betting that I'm going to lose everything I've put into the site over the last four months--I've put in recipies and it's also handy to be able to refer back to past weeks to see what the points for this or that was worth. I also like seeing the little chart that has my weight going down. 

I can't believe they have the nerve to advertise weight-watchers online without the etools!!  But whatever---I can easily imagine the corporate offices coming out with the philosophy that the meetings themselves are the key to success and that offering etools might discourage people from the meetings which would be a disservice to the person blah blah blah. Well, THIS person can make up her own mind as to what is useful and what is not.  But okay--I have more than one philosophical difference with the ww program.  They are free to roll out whatever program they want and charge whatever they want--I don't have to participate--but it would have been nice if the customer service reps could have read between the lines a little and thought--"hmmm this person wants to cancel but still wants e-tools.  She can't do that.  Maybe we should tell her."

I wish I could take some time right now and go run on the treadmill or whatever--I'm really mad about this.  Online program without e-tools???? Really???  And I'm supposed to feel good about weightwatchers???

Ok--enough.  I'm waiting for one more email from the customer service guy and then I will simply re-sign up.  If things are lost they are lost and I will move on.  In the meantime I will track here as best I can (good thing I happen to have today's food memorized) and I guess take the little points calculator with me until I'm up and running again.

Breakfast:
Bacon 2
cream of wheat with milk 7

Lunch:
wrap: 4
olives: 1
cheetos: 3
yogurt: 3
jalapenos with cream cheese: 1

Dinner--Relief Society--15?

Total: 36 (PERFECT!)

That's not bad--I usually don't bother to write the freebies--although I was starting to on the website because I think it's good for me to see them and realize that I am eating a lot.  Too much of a pain here though.

To finish on a bright note--today is Tuesday, I seem to usually be at a low on Tuesday mornings so it's a sort of unofficial weigh-day  193!!!!  YES!!!  OK--come on---just one more pound and I break new weigh loss ground!  What a relief though.  193 is the weight I need to be for the insurance this month.  PHEW!  Aruba is past and dealt with. Good for me!!!
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