Losing weight in spite of myself.

I began this blog in February 2011 as a way to help me not quit trying to lose weight, and to learn a few things. It's been an interesting and powerful experience. It certainly confirms what I've long suspected--that although I am a genuinely happy cheery person in the main, I am NOT a happy cheery dieter. I DETEST losing weight. I resent being overweight in the first place and I am a virtuoso in the art of self-sabotage. And YET--I'm doing it! I'm fighting and kicking and EATING all the way down, but the weight is finally going down. The plan I was following in February was a half-baked one largely based on wishful thinking. I gained a little weight and decided to get real. I knew I couldn't just join weightwatchers or count calories or do any one plan and expect to be successful. I decided if I was going to bother to make the effort to lose weight I was going to throw everything I could think of at the problem. And so I do. My real "Day One" for this blog is April 1, 2011. I joined weight watchers, I joined caloriecount.com (awesome website), I read the blog losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com religiously, I keep this blog faithfully, I joined the health programs sponsored by my insurance, I use the principles from overeater's anonymous, I use my church's 12 step program as well, I subscribe--and use--Healthy Cooking Magazine.



The result of all this? Painfully slow progress (About 20 lbs in 10 months). But it IS progress and like the little engine that could I keep on trying in my rebellious way. I have no intention of quitting. This is by far the longest sustained weight loss effort I've ever made in my life. Successful I think, because for the first in my life I've done this MY way--which I've discovered, involves a lot of pizza and restaraunt food. I'm convinced this is the only way to lose weight. For me it must be MY way. For you it MUST be YOUR way. Not weight watcher's way, not your doctor's way, but YOUR way. Any plan or idea I use is only a tool.

The latest plan to lose weight my way began on Oct 29, 2013. It really is my own crazy plan. As you'll see if you read that post. I've implemented the best ideas of all sorts of eating plans and thrown out the scale. A couple of months in and I'm definitely healthier. I'm actually enjoying myself. I won't weigh until April 1, 2014, so I'll see then if this works the way I hope it will.

There is no magic weight loss bullet. But there IS a great deal of magic in the discovery of what I can happily live with (very different from what weight watchers tells me I can happily live with) and still have the body and health I want.

Good luck to all of us on this journey. It's quite a trip!







Monday, January 14, 2013

Eat as much as I can!

I had an insight about myself this morning as I was thinking about the great abundance and variety of food I have. This weekend, I was reading a book about careers with my daughter adn it became very evident that EXPLORATION is a fundamental part of who I am. I want to go everywhere--see my blog http://travelenvelope.blogspot.com, major in everything, meet everyone, do everything...and EAT everything. No wonder I have trouble with food! Telling me to limit my food or portions is like telling me not to see the sunset--I simply refuse to do it. I would literally rather be fat. So how can I see things differently? I like the book, "French Women Don't get Fat" which talks about the French passion for food, and how they honor that passion by being very selective and picky. That resonates with me. If I can treat food the way I treated Disney World---that is, I was determined to see and do as much as I could--but to do that I had to accept that I literally couldn't see all four parks in one day. Not only that, but to really SEE Fantasyland, I couldn't just race through it full blast. I had to walk slowly sometimes, and stop and look and experience Fantasyland. Can I learn to treat food the same way? If I go to the olive garden and gorge myself on breadsticks can I really experience the delight of the entree let alone dessert? What if my goal became to enjoy food as MUCH as I possibly can--and actually EAT as much as I can with full pleasure? My grandparents had the right idea, "save room for dessert." I've just misapplied that philosophy because I can ALWAYS stuff dessert in. But if I truly want the max chocolate chip cookie experience, maybe I can learn to not eat 5 pieces of pizza first.
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